Friday, August 24, 2012

5 steps to the solution to insecurity

"Anybody can be like everybody else.   Only those who are exceptional choose to believe the possible over the probable.   You, beloved, were created to be exceptional."
                                                            ---------Beth Moore

 Can you imagine that there is a God that actually knows the number of hairs on our head and knows us by name?   We were fearfully and wonderfully made.   And we were bought with a price.

We are exceptional.  

Why do we so often feel inferior?   Less important.   Less needed.  So insecure.

It starts so young.   And steals so much from us --- Our  Joy.  Love.   Relationships.  Friendships.  The list could go on forever.

Listen to this story.   It's scary how much I can relate.

A girl was trying to be faithful to her early-morning quite time.   She tells a story about listening to the Bible on tape while she worked out on her treadmill.

In between verses, my mind would wander to other things, like my flabby arms.   I began to scold myself for not being more diligent with exercise.  Then I followed my thoughts down a path of how disappointed I was that I let my weigh fluctuate.  I would veer off my miserable mental path every few seconds to tune back into the Bible that was still reading in my ear.  I remember distinctively tuning in just in time to hear Psalm 84:1.
How lovely is your dwelling place, O LORD Almighty!
Wow!  That is sooooooo me!!!  Can you relate?!

So how can we start helping each other out?  How can we be a part of the solution to insecurity?

In her book, So Long Insecurity, Beth Moore suggests these steps:::

1.) Stop Making Comparisons
The nature of our competition depends to a large extent on what we tend to value.  If appearance is a personal premium, we have the tendency to rate ourselves according to the looks of those in eyeshot.

 2.) Start Personalizing Other Women
If she got the guy we wanted, we don't see her in terms of a multilayered life of ups and downs, self-doubts, and second guesses.  We depersonalize her into a manipulator or a relationship wrecker.  It's easier to despise her that way.

3.) Don't Trip Another Woman's Insecurity Switch
If you have a fabulous figure, you don't always have to wear a skimpy bathing suit when you and your husband are going boating or to the beach with several other couples.  By all means, wear it for him in a less public place, but take caution before you parade it in front of all the other husbands and their wives.

4.) We Must Be Examples of Secure Women
Most women will likewise never believe that a secure woman is a real, live possibility until they see one face-to-face.  Problem-to-problem.  Theat-to-threat.  Chase-to-grace.  If you'll become the first example in your sphere of influence, you won't be the last.

And one more that is not in her list but that she talks about in detail:::

: Money/Status/Things will NOT make you more secure.
We are all so very tempted to think that financial solidity would make us secure.  No amount of stuff and no amount of money can soothe the savage beast of insecurity within us all.   Our world system has made financial promises it can't keep...and it's finally admitting it.  We had all better get serious about making wiser financial  decisions and learning the science of saving and saying "no" to our WANTS.
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The insecurity equation can play out in any number of ways.   These are a few:::

  • I tried to talk to her + she seemed really distracted = she hates me.
  • She's really gorgeous + she gets a lot of attention that I don't = she must be really conceited.
  • She's got this + she's got that = I've got nothing.
  • She doesn't have this problem + I've got that problem = she doesn't have a care in the world.
  • Look what she's got on + look what I've got on = I have the fashion taste of a tsetse fly.
Do any of those sound vaguely familiar?  I mean she hits it right on!!!

I know that all of us have different issues.   And I'll be perfectly honest.  Before I started reading this book, I truly did not think I had any trouble with insecurity.  Now, almost finished with the book, I realize I do have struggles that I would have never identified had I not read her book.   Since I can identify those insecurities, I can now know how to recognize them, fight against them, and move on from them. 

All women are insecure.

If I could recommend any book in the world to women of all ages, this would be the one!!!

"Take your dignity back no matter where you've been or what has happened to you.   Hold on to your security for all you're worth.  It is yours.  Nothing and no one can take it from you." ---Beth Moore

I wish for you a weekend of love, joy, and memories!

Now get out there and take hold of your security!!!   And then pass it on to your fellow girls!

All info. comes from Beth Moore's book So Long, Insecurity.

Monday, August 20, 2012

I'd Choose You

"Mom, nothing's gone right since I left for school this morning," groaned Norbert.....
"Did you miss the roller coaster ride to school again?" his mother asked. "Well, I got to the coaster stop just in time, but everyone else already had someone to sit with. So I had to sit all by myself."
As he spoke, a big, big tear rolled down his trunk.  "Norbert," his mother said, in her softest, warmest voice, "if I could use my arms to hug only one child, guess which one I'd choose....."

..."If I could use my voice to cheer for only one child, guess which one I'd choose...."

.."if I could give a 'You're Someone Special!" medal to only one child....guess which one I'd choose."

..."if I could help just one child realize what an exciting and wonderful future God has just for him, guess which child I'd choose."

...if I could tell him what an exciting and wonderful future he has, especially on those days when he doesn't get picked....guess which one I'd choose every time.

I'd choose you, forever and always!

"Son, God chose you too. On your worst days and your best days, God's love always shines on you," his daddy said...
                                                                        ------ "I'd Choose You!"   by John Trent




With the new school year starting, I am finding myself very weepy.  {Which really, I'm always weepy. Especially when it comes to my children. What can I say? I'm a weepy mama}.    Even though I'm not experiencing the 'real school' yet, I know time is passing me by so quickly and as bad as I want to stop it, I can't!

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Anyway,  I love the message behind this precious book.

The point being made is as parents we should always remember to give our children 'our blessing.'


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It's not a formal ritual or something complicated or confusing.  It involves five simple steps from the Bible that place affirmation, encouragment, and acceptance right in a child's heart.
  • giving appropriate, meaningful touch, such as a big, loving hug
  • speaking words of affirmation, represented by cheering
  • expressing high value, as seen in the "You're Someone Special Medal"
  • picturing a special future (children often hear parents' predictions about their future with literal effect)
  • making an active commitment to include the blessing as a regular part of their lives

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The author's example of his blessing to his children goes like this:::

"Lord may you bless Kari and Laura today.  May you help them to know how much you love them and what a wonderful future you have for them.  Thank you for all the warmth and love you've put in their lives and how kind and strong they're both becoming.  And Lord, may they always know that we love them, and may they always know that out of all the kids in this world----- we'd choose them.  Amen."

So simple but with such a huge impact on a child's heart for now and all the years to come!


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I pray that you all have had a sweet "first day", and that God will bless your precious ones as they {and you} embark on a new journey!

And may we all always remember to let our sweet ones know that no matter what, we'd choose them!

"The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people,  his treasured possession."  ----Deuteronomy 7:6

Friday, August 17, 2012

Who really knows what this post is about.....

I had a whole bunch of good ideas that made perfectly good sense that I had planned to write here, but after several interruptions from some cute little kiddos, and with it now being entirely too late, I lost all of it.  So.....here is a.....well I'm not sure.


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I really like this red barn abd the simplicity of the house.  Looks so calm and relaxing.

Store in Style

I have been studying on what to do with my bathroom for months.  I love the look of this one.

How do you like my new haircut?
Soooooo tempting to get highlights...

Just kidding ;-)
I'm totally too chicken to do this, but I love this hairdo.

:)

I need a few copies of this to post around my house;)

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"True unity is not agreeing on everything, it’s working through the mess together. Comparison steals unity and joy. Want to combat jealousy? Actively praise someone else! Encouragement brings women together. Use my platform to promote others."
                                                           -------- Joy, Gracefull Mama


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"Learn to see God in the details, in the laundry, the dishes, the ants on the ground. We were created to resonate with stories. God loves stories, Jesus is a story. Also, read good fiction. When I read good storytelling, I’ll learn to tell my stories better."
~Sarah Markley, The Best Days of My Life


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"God appoints people who disappoint to point to the God who doesn’t. There are no Rock Stars here. Christ is the Rock and we are the stars who reflect His light. Success is found in servanthood and obedience right where I am. Christians aren’t about applause, they are about an altar. God wants real, honest, threadbare women to do His work His way. I’m not rain, I can’t quench the dry places. I can only point to the one who can. But I can have my voice join my sisters’ voices and together we make thunder!"
 ~Ann, A Holy Experience

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Good night friends!

Happy Friday~

Monday, August 13, 2012

Mirror Mirror on the wall....

Marriage is a major vehicle for the gospel’s remaking of your heart from the inside out and your life from the ground up.” ----Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage

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{The story behind the pictures: I had gone to do my morning walk (I'm trying!), and when I got home John had made the bed and left this note.}

You know, it really stinks sometimes when you want someone to "see all their faults and shortcomings, and do life the way you think they should."   But somehow it kinda backfires on you.   God puts a mirror in front of your life and you see all of your own faults and shortcomings.
It has occured to me in the last few months that marriage can be one big fat mirror.....to the point of being totally obnoxious.....like, I don't want to see my faults, thank you very much....this is not about me, it's about him.....please stop pointing those things out to me......he's not perfect either Lord.....I mean really, I can't take all the blame, right?
And no, I'm not saying that my John is perfect.   But when I started this Love Dare journey, I was thinking I would learn a lot and I could teach him a thing or two.

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I believe we think that way so often about all situations in our lives.   We judge people thinking our sins are somehow 'less' offensive.   When Christ died for all sin.

"For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;  Being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus." -----Romans 3:23,24

"You can give undeserved love to your spouse because God gave undeserved love to you----repeatedly, enduringly."

"He was willing to love you even though you didn't deserve it, even when you didn't love back.  He was able to see all your flaws and imperfections and still choose to love you.  His love made the greatest sacrifice to meet your greatest need.  As a result, you are able to (by His grace) walk in the fullness and blessing of His love.  Now and forever."
                                                                                -------The Love Dare

To me, that's the beginning and the end of all my questions.   When I want to point my finger at my husband and pick out all of his problems, this is what God continuously brings to mind.   This is my mirror.   God loves me.  Even enough to die for me.  And he continues to love me.   And I do not deserve it.  Period.

There's the wonder of sunset at evening, The wonder as sunrise I see; But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul Is the wonder that God loves me.

O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all! Just to think that God loves me. O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all! Just to think that God loves me.

 There's the wonder of springtime and harvest, The sky, the stars, the sun; But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul Is the wonder that's only begun.

O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all! Just to think that God loves me. O, the wonder of it all! The wonder of it all! Just to think that God loves me.




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Many days I find myself worn-out with life.   I can't keep up.   I can't be everything to everyone.  I can't figure it all out.   I can't be super-mom and super-wife.   I let people down.  I let myself down.  And most importantly, I let God down. 

Marriage is not a sprint but a marathon.  {As is life in general.}  And if I can learn something new each time it gets ugly, I'll take it.  I believe that God uses marriage to grow us.   To grow us in lots of ways, but mostly to grow us into creatures that are more like HIM.

"Chasing what doesn’t matter is the temptation in this life and when we do, we speed up life and miss what is important."

I so often chase what doesn't matter.   My to-do list, my empty desires, comparisons.....    and everytime I come up empty with nothing to show for it except wasted precious time.

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But everyday is a new day. His mercies are new every morning.

I need God every single day.  This is not a part-time proposition.  He alone can satisfy, even when all else fails me. 

Keep up the faith my dear friends! 

We are on a life-long journey together~